How to Overcome Defeat When You Don’t Get the Job

Let’s just be honest. Not getting the job is no fun. You put the effort in to research, apply, create a resume and cover letter, do the interview, maybe more than one, the follow-up, etc. Then you hear that you don’t get the job. 

But guess what? Despite that, you can still win! Let’s talk about how to recover after you don’t get the job. 

It’s easy to want to stay frustrated when you get the call or the email that says, “We’re sorry, but we’ve gone with another candidate. Good luck in your job search.” But don’t let that keep you down. You can turn this into something positive and learn from it. 

1) Reflect on What Happened

 We talked about this a little in a previous episode of The Workforce Link Podcast, “3 Things You Need to Know About Failure in Order to Find Success.” 

Not that you failed because you didn’t get the job, but the same principle applies to what we discussed in that episode regarding the After Action Review. We’ll link to that episode in the show notes. 

Reflection is key to moving forward. 

And remember as you reflect. The Recruiter or employer didn’t say, “Sorry, but you’re never getting this job.” It’s important to remember that it’s not personal – it’s just business. They’re not rejecting you as a person; They’re just saying “I don’t think you’re the right fit.” And that may not be forever. 

Reflect on the fact that there are a lot of talented people who applied for the same job as you, and the fact that you made it to the interview process is huge. Count that as a victory, my friend. Not everyone gets past the application process. 

Many years ago I applied for a job doing social media for a company. I didn’t get the job. I was frustrated, but I knew I had the talent to do the job and that there was a company who would want me. When I applied to this job, companies weren’t yet on board with the understanding that using social media to grow their business really wasn’t an option. So, I had some pretty stiff competition. 

I decided I would start a personal blog just focused on hiring me. In it, I told past stories that showed my enthusiasm, level of leadership, willingness to work hard, etc. The employer got wind of that, read my stuff, and reached out to me and said, “I made a mistake. YOU are the one for the job!” 

What would have happened if I wouldn’t have stepped back from the situation, caught my breath, then implemented another plan? I probably never would have gotten that job. And guess what? It was a great training ground that led me to where I am today – using social media to connect employers and job seekers. 

Remember that perspective is everything. 

2) Change Your Mindset to be Grateful

You’re telling me that I need to be grateful that I didn’t get the job? Yep, that’s exactly what I’m saying. 

Your character says everything. How you react to a “no” matters, because you never know if that no might turn to a yes someday. 

I want to encourage you to send the employer a thank you note for letting you know. They didn’t have to tell you that you didn’t get the job, but they were courteous enough to do so. By reciprocating that courtesy, you’re going to blow their minds. Why? Because most people do not take the time to send a thank you note. You stand out and they will remember that. 

And while you’re filling out that thank you note, don’t hesitate to let them know you’re still interested in working for their company in the future. Let them know you’ll touch base with them every now and then, and give them your contact information in case they have something come up. 

Make it very clear to them that you’re being proactive in your efforts, even after rejection. 

3) Be Humble

It’s easy to get our feelings hurt and move on with an attitude that says, “Forget them. I’m better than them anyway.” Or insert your own statement here. We’ve all been there. 

But what if we stopped allowing our pride to get in the way and went back to steps #1 and #2? Being the bigger person, my friend, will get you so much further in life, even if you can’t see that now. 

And remember.. There could be another job that opens up at that company. They’ll remember your attitude. They’ll remember your humility. It’s very possible that you were one of their top choices, but just didn’t make the cut this time around. And it’s also possible that if that’s the case, they might skip the hiring process next time around and just call you, especially if you remarried to send them that “thank you” card we talked about in step #2. 

Bear Bryant, former head coach of the University of Alabama says about pride, “Show class, have pride, and display character. If you do, winning takes care of itself.”

Humility. Humility. Humility. 

Let’s do a quick recap of what we’ve discussed today. 

We’re not always gonna get the job, right? 

#1 – We need to reflect on what happened. 

#2 – Be grateful. 

#3 – Be humble. 

Not getting the job can feel so defeating, especially if you’ve been looking for a while. But don’t let that keep you down, my friend. The right opportunity for you is out there! 

And I trust that if you follow these 3 steps, you will recover from disappointment quicker. You’ve got this!